In The Days After TOMORROW
by Guarding My Castle
Summary: Story set sometime after "No Tomorrow" It is not a continuation but a sequel because there is a gap in time. But it is still all the players. How far later? I am not real sure. You will have to read the story to find out, because I don't know either
1. The Beginning

**If any of the characters from the TV show Castle show up in this story they are not mine. They belong to the wonderful people at ABC**

**This is not exactly follow up to No Tomorrow. It is in the future  
We will have to see where this story takes me because it is actually writing itself** **and I have no control of what it is doing. It has a mind of its own**

**Can someone please come save me? I am being held prisoner inside my keyboard  
**

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A dreary overcast day in New York City.

The sun is hidden behind the storm clouds. Rain is pelting the windows leaving streaks of water mixed with the dirt from the city. It is obvious that no one had cleaned the glass in a very long time

She enters the lobby and is greeted by the building's security officer

"Good morning ma'am" he smiles to the woman as she approaches the elevator

The ride to the second floor seems to take longer than she remembers

She steps out of the cab, approaches the front door of the loft, and inserts her key. She has not been here in a very, very long time. There was really no need to come to this place. There is nothing still here of any real importance to her

As she steps inside the main room it is painfully obvious that no one has lived here in a very long time.

The furniture is covered with cotton drop cloths to keep the dust at bay. All the electrical devices from the refrigerator to the table lamps have been unplugged. The drapes on the windows are drawn to keep the direct sunlight from damaging any of the contents of this space.

The environmental system has been placed in the vacation mode to only come on if the temperature were to become extreme either hot or cold but not to operate in the comfortable occupied mode normally

She makes a quick sweep of the main room looking to be sure nothing has happened to any of the items that were here. These items that were treasures to the owner.

The Grand Piano. The poker table. Even the ship model on the table. Everything seems to be unharmed

Even though the mood inside the loft is somber, the memories are vivid and happy. Walking thru the dining room and into the kitchen reminds her of the past events that occurred here. Memories of better times. More playful Memories of diner parties attended by all the best friends anyone could ever have.

The kitchen is organized but quiet. The pantry is empty of staples, but all the appliances are ready to be awakened at any moment for a fast breakfast or a Sunday brunch with loved ones

She moves to the bedroom. The bed is made, and then a cover placed to protect it from the dust. The closets still contain some items of clothing but are only partially full. Most of the clothes that were formerly kept there were gone and only the less worn and out of style remain. These items will be best suited for charity

The bathroom is void of any personal items. All the cosmetics, hair care, oral care and skin care toiletries are gone.

There are no fresh towels on the hangers beside the shower. There is no soap or shampoo waiting for the next to lather up.

The study is eerily empty. The book cases are still filled with all the first editions and personally signed copies of books that were collected over the years.

Books from all the writers that were personal friends and at the same time competitors of his work. Reference books used to guarantee accuracy in the story lines. Making sure every detail was accurate down to the last drop of blood described

There are still many photographs left on the shelves. Photographs from happier times. Playful pictures of the entire family frolicking on the beach, at the park or at a faire. Photographs taken during vacation trips to Europe, Asia, Hawaii, and other exotic places

The painting that has hung over the desk from the beginning of her memories of this room. The image that brought attention to the man that occupied that chair. The image of a never ending stairway exemplifying the infinite imagination of the man behind the stories

She sits down at the desk and looks across the room and tries to envision what it was like for him to reside here and weave his tales. The images that appeared in his mind and were transferred to paper or more accurately computer that brought happiness to his readers or sometimes sadness to their hearts He seemed to have the knack to do both at the same time.

Either way he was the inspiration for many others

After a few moments, she reaches out and opens the top desk drawer. Knowing the man who formerly resided here, she was surprised that nothing jumped out from the desk.

She gently picked up several items and examined them. She almost felt as if she were reaching for something forbidden. This place where he performed his magic was sacred. No one had been allowed to look into his secrets His slight of hand where he was taking simple words and turning them into stories that pulled people in with wild abandon

But the drawer contained the usual contents. Pencils, pens, a note pad with scribbling on the cover and many hundreds of metal paper clips, all linked together forming a very long chain necklace. The sight of this gives her rise to laugh because she knew what this represented

In the right hand drawer she finds the contents more interesting. There are several journals. These hard bound books are all dated. The words on oldest is faded to the point that it has almost disappeared but appears to begin in the early 1990's

Once she opens the cover and begins reading the tale inside, she is swept in like a riptide pulling her deeper and deeper into its grasp.

The book is a diary. It contains the musings of its owner. A man broken hearted over the loss of his true love


	2. The One That Got Away

**I told you this story is keeping me captive inside the keyboard. But it did let me see just a little of 6x01.**

**I feel better now.**

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M.J. takes out the oldest journal and opens it to the first page. She sits back in the chair and begins reading. The words are faded and in some places almost impossible to read. Some pages were evidently written in pencil, some in fountain pen and others in ball point.

The journal is written in a very different style than the books. This is, after all, a diary. A log documenting events as they happened. It is the musings of the creator and author. No editing for content or spelling has taken place. He can put his words in any order he so desires. In this case it is the sometimes day to day activities as they occurred. Other entries are weeks apart depending on whether something of importance occurred during that time. As the world around him rotates he commits to paper all of his thoughts and feelings

The story begins of a young man growing up in difficult times. His single mother sometimes struggling just to keep a roof over their heads. She takes odd acting jobs on Broadway but most often off Broadway where the pay is meager but usually steady.

There were many times where their life style was meager. But he tells in his journal that she did everything she could to make sure they he was never hungry and he always has a bed to sleep in and a roof over his head.

Christmas gifts were usually something not bought but a gift from her heart none the less. And she would always manage to perform "The Nutcracker" for him to enjoy. .

There were other times she was well compensated for her work and dedication to her craft and he was able to go to private schools. Unfortunately he would, on occasion, do things that brought the wrath of the school administration on his head and he would be sent away to find a new center of learning elsewhere.

The words from this book tell the reader that these two people were special none the less. They had a special bond between Mother and son.

The young woman notices as she reads that within this book there is no mention of any kind about his father figure. This simply reinforces the stories she was told about the lack of that person while the writer was growing up.

The stories written run from fun and sad. The writing inside indicates the signs of the beginnings of what will be the tremendous talent that comes later in his life

Once she finished the pages of the first journal, she realizes that several hours have passed. But she really has no special place to be and wants to learn everything there is to know about this man that put these words on paper.

She selects the next in the long line of books that are all ordered by the date on the front

The prior diary began from early high school until his college years. The writer begins by telling the stories of partnering up with other young men of his persuasion and partying until all hours of the night and not dedicating the proper amount of time to the task of education.

But he still indicates that he truly wants to write stories. Tell tales of fictional characters dreamed up from inside his imagination. He finally completes his novel and tries to sell it to a publisher.

Each new entry in the diary for a month tells of the rejection letter received that day from yet another publisher. He writes that he keeps the letters .Re reads each one to force himself to do better in the next manuscript

Then one day he meets HER. She is crossing the quad and he simply is taken by her. She is lovely. She is full of life like he truly wants for himself. He stops and introduces himself and she does not step back. She greets him with joy in her face.

He writes in the journal for that day "I met the one I have been looking for all my life. Her name is Kyra Blaine

They connect immediately. She seems to complete him and take away the emptiness in his writing. She gives him more purpose in life. He tries to dedicate at least some period of time each and day to composing stories of fiction and she makes it easier for him.

The story in this diary is filled with details. Many details of how the two of them were in love. Deeply in love. They had become in separate able. No one would come between them. No one COULD come in between. They would not let themselves be apart He is always with her and her with him. They are in tune. They are connected.

But all is not well in their peaceful bubble. Her mother considers him a bum. A low life. He did not come from money. He is not rich His mother had to work to pay for his schooling. He had to take a few odd jobs on occasion if he wanted to have extra spending money to take her on a date. But he found himself falling deeper and deeper in love with her.

Sheila Blaine said that he would end up a teacher of literature at some junior college one day. But he really didn't care what his future mother in law thought of him. He loved Kyra

The journal goes on and on telling of the struggles that were part of their daily activities. But she turned out to be his good luck charm. While they were together, he sold his first book. He didn't get a lot of money from the sale, but it was a published work of his and now he had a better chance of getting the next one on the shelves at the major book stores.

One day he decides that he is ready to take the plunge. Make a move in their relationship with her. He suggests that they get married

But this is where the story of the two star crossed lovers' goes bad. One side of this pair is the story of a hopeful writer. The other a free spirited woman determined to be her own person without help.

A woman not tied down to one man. Especially this man evidently. A woman who does not need the bonds of marriage. A single spirit in every way. She calls marriage a Jurassic institution

They knew that each was right for the other but then the forces surrounding their lives kept pulling her away from making it a lifelong commitment.

That free spirit of hers was determined to make other choices and to not become permanently attached to him

The left for Paris. The woman who firmly believed that he would never amount to anything worthwhile was pleased he daughter left him

He asked her to marry him.

She left.

She expected him to follow.

But he did not

The reader was not expecting the depth of pain in this story. She knew about the woman from earlier in his life and that he was with her for a few years. Just not to the extent that the pages of this journal describe. She struggles with her own emotions in trying to continue reading. She feels hurt for this man and how could anyone do this to him

But she gathers more strength and continues.

As she continues to turn pages she reads the details of how this love fell apart.

In the final line in the story about this woman he places in capital letters

SHE'S THE ONE WHO GOT AWAY


	3. The First Mistake

As M.J. places the first journal back on the desk she lets out a sigh. A deep breath that grabs any and all hurt from inside and lets it leave the body when she exhales. She now takes a hold of the next bound volume from the desk as she takes note of the time on the wall clock

The early morning of her arrival has passed into the late morning. But she does not care. She has become totally engrossed in the tales being woven from inside these pages

The next journal begins with him publishing his first best seller. He decided to dedicate this book to his lost love, Kyra.

But he has now come of age so to speak. His writings are being noticed. He has been asked to go on book tours. He is asked be interviewed by magazines and newspapers. The book stores are placing his books on prominent display near the front where patrons entering are also taking note

It is after one of these book signings he meets the next woman to join him in an intimate relationship. His mother invited him to attend a cast party after one of her plays. He initially did not plan to go but the book store was only a block from the theatre. So he decided to end his day with a large share of the cities drama kings and queens

He writes in the journal that Meredith was a beauty. He was immediately drawn to her but he had no idea why the two of them connected in this way, but they did. Actually he comments it was probably the sex. Maybe is just the sex because this woman is crazy. She was willing to do the deed any time and anywhere. As he was someone on the rebound from the one who got away, he was especially vulnerable to participate in her advances

Of course this willingness to join together at random times and at random places is most likely the reason that the next shift in the path of his life occurred. Not by plan, but by circumstance or possibly BAD timing or simply basic human needs prevailed.

After what seemed like a long prelude to future long term events, she comes into the apartment and announces "I'm pregnant" with all the emotion of someone needing to order diner from the local Chinese take out

He was working on his next novel and wanted to concentrate on that but being told you are going to be a father tends to distract you from the course you were planning on traveling down

The one most important thing his mother had taught him was to be a responsible man. He was and is an honorable man so he tells her that he will do the right thing when it comes to her and the baby and that they will get married.

Assuming that would be the end of any and all drama in their lives he found himself proven wrong again. But he would for the first time find himself on a road that he was not expecting to travel down. He had always been a bit of a scoundrel but getting married and having a child will usually cause you to settle down. So he plans to make his family the focus of his existence.

After the marriage, he works very hard to betters himself and makes a home for his wife and future child. His books are doing very well and he begins to build a tight social network of friends and allies

He starts to support the local political leaders with his financial contributions and attendance at rallies. He becomes involved in neighborhood activities. In the course of these adventures he builds bonds that he hopes will help him in the future

Seven months after the wedding he finds himself in a delivery room at the hospital watching the medical professionals getting ready to deliver a baby into this world.

The former gad about town suddenly finds himself holding a tiny red headed fair skinned, blue eyed girl

A feeling covers every inch of his being when this happens. Any thought he had ever had about life and what was important to him changed in an instant.

He never knew a person could be totally and completely changed by a six pound bundle of life. He found himself instantly in love with this child. His daughter!

He knew his life is changed forever and he is perfectly happy in that change

The diary goes on to tell the stories of midnight feedings, diaper changes and holding and rocking the little girl to sleep when she cried.

The words on the paper of this diary showed the level of love this man had for this tiny little girl. He used the words "I don't think I will love this much ever again"

But soon the journals begin telling stories much darker and sinister. The author is suspecting his wife and the mother of the precious child that they brought into the world of not being faithful to the vows she took.

He writes that on several occasions he was alone with their baby and she was late returning home after a rehearsal at the movie lot and she was in a hurry to sleep instead of joining him in intimate evening together. He began suspecting that all was not well in the marriage.

Then one evening when he was at a book signing and he had left his wife and child at home the event ended rather early and he decided to head home to be with his wife and daughter so they could have for some much needed family time together as family.

BUT

His planned family time was finished before it even got started. He opened his bedroom door to find his wife and the movie director she was working with, in their marriage bed "rehearsing a sex scene" without cameras or crew. The only one in the audience was a one year old baby girl in her bed in the very next room not even yet asleep.

He describes his emotions as best as he could relate them. For a writer of tales, he cannot even think of how to verbalize what went on inside him at that moment

He wrote that he knew it was time to move on in his life but he wanted the child protected. He was going to make sure that he had custody of the girl and would see to it that she was raised without the unnecessary drama of movie actors and directors in her life. Especially those movie stars who are willing to put anything else above their own child's best interest. Because of that he decides that he will not allow any other woman to get to know the girl.

He tells of the divorce and how she did not even fight for the child. This told him all he needed to know about where the child ranked with her own mother.

His writings are now showing a deep dark pit that he has climbed into. He moves in with his mother temporarily and gets her help in caring for the child.

He spends almost all day every day with the child. Caring for her and making sure she knows that she is loved. However his evenings are spent more in trying to satisfy more animal needs. But he keeps his personal life away from his daughter.

As far as he's concerned, there is no woman out there good enough for his daughter to become friends with.

MJ finishes the reading of this volume and closes the cover. She has tears in her eyes. She only had been told a limited tale concerning Meredith. This book filled in several blanks for her.

But she has become hooked on this story and it is too good to let her leave it alone. She must know more about this man that has meant so much to her. This part of him that she only heard limited stories about.

She places this document down and picks up the next one and opens it to the first page


	4. The Next Mistake

**Time for my usual disclaimer. My story is AU. Please don't compare with the show**  
**I like going other places.** But **I will have to say this one is very different even for me.  
I normally like doing humor** **and fun**  
**I cannot explain how this one happened**

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She feels like the weight of the world has fallen over her. The knowledge contained in these daily notes are very enlightening. She has learned more about this man and his life in just over half a day than she knew in all her years before

The next book looks the same on the outside as all the others but she knows it contains so much more than just ink on paper. She just does not realize that in this volume the life of this man takes a turn down a bumpy road that normally would lead to disaster.

Beginning on the first page she is struck by the difference in the stories contained therein. He starts writing about his escapades traveling around the country. Visiting cities from coast to coast. Doing book tours and new release parties. Listing in great detail his salacious adventures with various random women. A "New Girl In Every Port" so to speak

Beginning here, there seems to be a total disregard for personal dignity. It is as if he left all of his self worth on the table in the courtroom where his divorce was signed. Reading between the lines there seems to be a theme running thru these stories of the lack of self respect on his part.

He lists in great detail the women he picked up. The one night stands, the wild drunken adventures with whatever skirt decided she wanted to be the next in line.

MJ had not known how far out this man had been at one time. She only knew about his life later on. She was not aware that in the day, he was the number one playboy of the book circuits.

He wrote down these adventures like he was proud of how bad he had become. She found a reference to him getting drunk and taking a midnight ride on a New York City Police Horse. NAKED. He wrote this story as if he were actually proud of his actions. He goes on to tell that he would have gone to jail if it had not been for his friendship with the mayor that he had created several year before.

It is during this time in his career that he selects an agent. A person to take care of the business relationship with the publisher. Paula Haas has come highly recommended. She is all business. He is glad that he found her. She is the best when it comes to taking care of her clients. She gets every dime they disserve.

But even she falls prey to his rugged charms and they do break the sacred bond between writer and agent. ONCE! They both agree that was fun but it is best if they keep the relationship to that of writer and his agent. He does, however, mention her when she is used as a character in one chapter of one of his books.

But contained in this particular book in the diary of the writer are some much lower key writings about his life at home. While he is publicly a scoundrel, a master of the macabre, a raunchiest playboy.

He is still the loving father of the little girl.

He writes lovingly about her adventures growing up. The two of them going to the park every Sunday afternoon during the more pleasant months of the year. Taking her shopping for little girl clothes. Going to the natural history museum. As a single father having to learn do things that are fun for a little girl.

He tells about learning how to dress a little girl. How to shampoo, dry and braid her long hair.

Just play with her.

But the highest priority on his list "Protect Her!" from the evils of the world. He considers her mother to be one of the largest of those evils.

MJ laughs as she reads these paragraphs about protecting his child from the bad people in the world. He basically said that he wants to protect her from men just like himself. He evidently does not see the parallel in the story between the way he is acting around women and what he is keeping away from his own daughter

As she returns to the pages she sees a firm division in his life. While he is running around with every girl in town, he keeps a barrier wall around his daughter.

In spite of all his protections, her mother does occasionally drop in and back out of their lives. Every time she comes to New York, he falls victim to her female persuasion.

He has realized that she is like some sweet treat that tastes so very good and is actually so very bad for you. You go to the carnival and have a cotton candy, a funnel cake, or a deep fried Twinkie. It is so very delicious, but it is the last thing the body should have inside

But in his need to actually feel vindicated he falls into her trap repeatedly over the next few years.

He continues telling his stories in his novels of his factional character and their adventures in the world of spies and robbers. In the course of his writings, he actually is allowed to spend a few months inside the world .of espionage. He is not sure how it was allowed, but it happened so he decides to not question how it took place, he is just happy that it did.

Again being the rogue that he is, he takes a run at the woman spy he is partnered with. And again he is successful in his attempt in add her to his ever growing list of beauties that are represented like notches on the old bedpost.

But again, he finds that having is not nearly as good as wanting. Once more he lost his interest in her as soon as the two of them cross that line

MJ is wondering more and more how could this be the same man she loved so dearly. She has never seen any of the personality traits described in these dairies actually be in the man himself

She continues her reading.

It is during this time in his life, he begins a relationship with his publisher. Gina. She is another beauty but totally in love with money. As the publisher representative at Black Pawn she continually stay on top of him to provide more and more books and stories to keep the money flowing.

He makes the next major mistake in his life. He marries her

The fun of the relationship goes sour very quickly. If he had thought it through, he would have seen that this was actually no better than the first marriage. He writes in the journal that he is not letting this woman any closer to his daughter than her own mother.

If he had been thinking with the right body part he would have known she was not the ONE either. He came to the realization it was wrong when he noticed he kept the wall up around his daughter and kept his new wife apart from the girl.

He discovered that in fact she only wanted him for his ability to build stories that sold books and in turn made money for her and the company.

He comes to the conclusion that this was a giant mistake and he has no choice but to end it before someone gets hurt emotionally.

He has spun out of control and he decides to close the door on his life. In more ways than one. He writes the final chapter of his series of books by killing off his main character.

That way with the divorce and the ending of the series, he believes he can start fresh and new.

But in truth he has no place new to go.

MJ closes another book and places it on the stack with the ones she had already read. She looks at the journals that she has not yet opened and realizes something very interesting.

He covered about fifteen years of his life in three volumes. Yet there are five books left to read. And knowing the times lines these represent, he must have had a lot to say about that period of time in his life.

The parts she has read are just the prelude to a greater story of who he came to be and the woman who brought him there


	5. A New Beginning

She picks up the next of the canvas bound books. She leans back in the chair that once held this spinner of yarns and slowly runs her fingers down the spine and front. Her mind wanders considering what amazing stories will begin in this volume. She knows the basics of how this all started and now she will unveil the words to herself

Gently she pulls the cover back to reveal the opening page.

This volume begins with a statement that she has to re-read several times. Each time her smile widens

"I just met the woman I want to spend the rest of my life with"

This statement was written in bold letters as if the writer meant it with all his being. Well he probably did at the time think he found his one. He just was hoping

MJ reads the story of the writer beginning with the release party for the final Derrick Storm novel. Gina was there, of course, pounding him about why did he kill off Derrick. Why didn't he just send him into retirement?

"I put a bullet in his head. How more retired can you be than dead?"

Then he discovers that his mother has been telling Gina that instead of writing a new character and starting a new book, he has just been sitting around the house in his underwear betting on the horses.

MJ laughs. So that's why he wanted her to move out?

Gina is demanding a new book or at least an outline or a treatment or Black Pawn will demand a return of their advance. He tells Gina that he had already returned the advance by divorcing her.

So somewhere between the last diary and this one they divorced. But he is still involved with her at a business level

As he describes it, the night is going the way so many of the release nights go. But he indicates that he has grown tired of this. All of the parties are the same. Women crawling up to him and flirting. Putting themselves up for grabs. The statements "I'm your biggest fan! Where do you get your ideas from?"

Wanting autographs. Of course he enjoys some of the places that these women offer for to him to sign upon but he indicates that these activities are actually not as interesting as they once were.

He describes talking to Alexis about the life they are leading. This is the first time she is mentioned as a teenager. But he describes her acting more like a responsible adult. He offers her a glass of Champaign and she refuses reminding him of her age.

He considers telling her some little story from his past, he realizes hoe inappropriate this is for a young girl. He is obviously having the feeling, because of his young daughter is being exposed to much more life than she should be witness to

He tells her that he really wished someone would just come up and say something different.

Then it happens

SHE happens

Not a deranged fan

He hears the voice calling his name. He describes it as "Not just a voice. NO! A sultry voice! The voice of a woman! Her voice"

He said "when I turned around I come face to face, not with just a woman. An angel, a vision, something I have never seen before".

NYPD Detective Kate Beckett

He had to admit "I AM SPEACHLESS"

He understands that she wants him to come to the station to talk about a case. "I go with her as if I am hypnotized. Not of my own free will. Just my body follows her like a trained puppy dog. And I don't care"

She put him in an interrogation room and starts throwing pictures in front of him asking if he knew anything about these people. He says NO but all he recognized the images represented his stories.

But he comments that all he can really think about of are her eyes.

"She looks at me and all I can focus on are THOSE Eyes looking back a time. I have never seen anything so beautiful"

He tells of his attempt to make this a date. A pick up but she was determined to not let it happen.

OH the challenge is on.

MJ giggles at the image being drawn in this story of this flippant playboy being smitten by a cop, trying to pick her up, and then being totally shut down by her.

The story continues as he talks about the questioning that she continues to throw at him and how, all he wants to do is look at her.

She is unwavering in her pursuit of the truth in the case in front of her no mater how hard he is trying, she just does not blink

She asks if he gets disturbing fan mail and he tells her that he has boxes and boxes containing many hundreds

After he finishes answering the questions she is sending his way, he agrees to provide all the disturbing fan letters that have been sitting in boxes in the office of Black Pawn Publishing.

She believes that his fan mail is the logical beginning to the investigation.

She releases him from custody and he has returned to his loft.

He tells that on the trip home all he can do is think about her. He realizes that she has caught him a little off guard and he can't figure out how

Once he arrives home he decides to re look at his own novels to see if there is something there that might help in the investigation.

He decides that this woman is not going to get the better of him. He devises a plan.

The next day he shows up at the station and offers to help in the case. The reception from Detective Beckett is much less than welcome however Captain Montgomery thinks it is a good idea.

This does not set well with the hard nosed, by the book detective

He tells of assisting in the review of the letters looking for some thread to a suspect. During his time with her in the conference room he detects that there is a deep dark story inside of her.

She questions his repeated staring at her. He tells her that he is wanting her story. After she refuses to fill in the details, he spins his own background of her.

He writes that he realizes he hit a nerve when he mentioned the death of someone close to her. Probably her father and he actually feels that he opened a wound, so he pulls back

MJ often wondered just how and why he came to meet the detective. Now the details are here for her reading.

The story continues of how he irritates her with his childish ways and flippant disregard for police protocol. Using his connections with the mayor to jump the line in getting fingerprints out of the lab.

He arranges his own personal meeting with one of the victim's father.

He even takes evidence from the files and has to be tracked down and detained, AGAIN

He notes in his diary that having her arrest him had become a game for him

The story continues to tell how the case is actually solved with his help since all evidence pointed to some innocent party. He pointed out the reasons someone else was to blame.

The guilty party was arrested in an unusual chain of events resulting in him and her talking alone in an ally

He muses on how he tried one more time to make her his NEXT pickup.

He admits in his journal that she is drawing his interest like no woman ever has and he wants to know more about her

One more time she slams the door in his face. And this is a new experience for him. A woman who is not falling at his feet

It is at this moment that he realizes that he just found the solution to his writer's block. This woman is the answer for a new character but he also comments in his journal"

"I'm In Love"

But he also states "I have fallen in and out of love with random women in an elevator"

MJ laughs at the statement above .knowing how most men can do that so easily

This initial story of meeting and following the detective. that he calls enchanting. continues. He tells how he wormed his way into a permanant place with her unit. He convinces the mayor hat the detective will be the model for his next charachter and he will paint the NYPD in a good light with the press in doing so

So they allow him to shadow her much to her disgust.

His tale continues as he describes their encounters with killers and their crimes.

His time involved with this team becomes an almost daily event. He tells in the journal that he is not totally positive if he is more interested in the crimes or the crime solver.

She finally admits to him where the pain inside of her comes from when she tells him about the death of her mother and why she became a homicide cop. But she made it clear that he is to keep his hands off her mother's case.

He has decided that he wants to help her find the killer and by doing so she might change her feelings for him. So he gets the file and starts his own private investigation.

The relationship between him and the detective becomes complicated very quickly. He starts to think about her in a different way than he had any woman before her. Even his two wives never brought out the emotions inside. He is not sure what to do with them.

He is especially emotionally trapped when they have to go undercover at a charity ball. He purchases her a dress because he felt like she did not have one suitable to wear. When she arrived at his door wearing that gown, not only was he taken back, his mother and his daughter were equally impressed.

The homicide stories continue from killer to killer when suddenly an old flame of hers shows up.

He writes that he was not expecting that to happen and he did not realize himself that his feelings for her have changed from looking for a quick tumble to where they have become. Friends and partners. He believes that he actually feels jealous but since this is new territory for him we is not sure how to handle it.

"I want to tell her how I feel but HE is here and I am too late" He writes

MJ has become so engrossed in these books of his life, she does not realize that not only has she not eaten today but how late it has become.

But she decides that filling her mind with this history is more important than filling her stomach with food, so she keeps on reading later into the night


	6. The Ending of The Beginning?

The next chapter begins with a little confession on the part of the writer of this journal. His publisher made him do a photo shoot in the precinct with two women that appeared more at home in a topless bar with a stripper pole than in a police uniform.

His comment as to actually apologizing to the detective for the event brings happiness to MJ. He has grown she thinks

She had thought that this man was the playboy and would be more than happy in the wild side than to be with the police. But the more she reads she realizes that he was actually not comfortable in carrying on with this façade of wild party boy. He feels like he should do something to ease the tension between everyone in the group but he is not sure what that might be.

After the picture taking is over they get called to a crime scene where the reporter for the Ledger follows along. At the crime scene he impresses the woman journalist with his knowledge of crime scene evidence gathering.

Once they load the body on the morgue bus, the reporter chooses to ride in the front leaving the writer and the medical examiner alone in the rear of the vehicle. Actually not alone exactly. They are transporting the body.

He tells the doctor that he has been snooping into the death of the detectives' mother, against her wishes, and had found evidence that had not previously been detected.

This continuing unwanted delving into her mother's death has put a wall of distrust up between them. He doesn't understand because he truly just wants to help her find the person or persons responsible for this life changing event for her but she only sees it driving her into a deep dark rabbit hole similar to the one her father jumped into except his was in the bottom of a whisky bottle and hers is emotional.

But before their conversation goes much further the trip to the morgue is interrupted by a theft right out on the street. The theft of the body from the coroner's van.

MJ continues to read the adventures of this man and the woman that he has already admitted in these diaries that he has fallen in love with. But with his history can he really be in love or is it still just lust?

Tales of the team betting on who can solve a pair of murders, first leads to the entire station choosing sides between the team of him and her and the two junior detectives. It ends up with the two crimes being related

Followed by a suspect who proves to be innocent but also suffering from amnesia. The second part of that case actually results in him and his ex wife re joining in an attempt to rekindle their lost love from many years before.

Then one day it appears that the detective's day as the muse of the writer may be coming to an end. The author's agent arrives at his home informs him that he is on the short list to recreate a famous British Secret agent. This is like a new life is being born for the writer.

He actually began his love of writing when, as a very young man, a stranger handed him a copy of Casino Royal.

From that unexpected moment forward the young boy decided that he wanted to be a wordsmith and be able to spin tales like the ones contained in this novel. He worked hard from that day forward the perfect his style, his character development, and the story lines that wove the tales of mystery and suspense.

He knew that accepting this new offer would mean releasing the bonds that he created with her. But his mother reminded him that the detective solved crimes long before he entered her life and that she would probably be glad he would no longer follow her around. She also observed that the detective did not feel the grip on her heart that he felt in his.

He chooses to wait to tell anyone especially her that there was a possibility of them parting ways as partners

As he continues telling this story of the release of the first and probably the last Nikki Heat book his words tell the tale that it is obvious that he does not want to end the relationship with her.

He describes in great detail her arrival. He takes pause in looking at her in a different light than he has seen in the precinct. She arrives in a form fitting mini dress showing off her legs. Those legs of hers that seem to go on forever. She is gorgeous and he just wants to go and talk to her. But

.

His agent stops him from approaching HER to tell him that he has been offered the contract to write the new spy series and he finally admits he is not ready to let go of HER.

He writes that he approached her, she had just as read the dedication was made to her. He can tell she is taken back by his open admission of his admiration of her and her work.

He tries to bring himself to say something to her about his feelings but once more he looses his train of thought around her and the conversation returns to the case they are working.

She asks about his spy book future. He admits to her that he has the official offer to write the other books and will no longer follow her. He writes that he thinks he can see disappointment in her face that they are parting ways but then comments it is probably just wishful thinking on his part

As the stories continue over the next few cases MJ is amused at how this playboy has become a smitten teenaged boy around HER

Then and old flame enters the picture! Kyra Blaine

The woman who thought marriage was not for her is getting married and one of her bride's maids is killed. He is drawn back to her and they have long conversations about what happened to them. He admits he gets too close to her again but finds the strength to pull away from Kyra.

Because he has decided what he really wants is right in front of him and he will just have to wait until she is ready.

The story suddenly takes a turn none of them were expecting. They actually stumble on the man responsible for the death of her mother. More accurately the assassin that was hired to do the deed.

But to actually bring the person responsible out into the open, cash must be spent. Cash that the detective did not have nor could the city help. "But I can"

"I had to do this for HER" he writes in the diary "I will do anything for HER"

He felt like that was the least he could do after opening wounds in her heart so he tells of the money he gladly spent but then it is discovered the man that they were talking to was in reality the killer. A stand off happens in the station and she actually shoots the man who could explain to her why her mother had to die.

He tells what happens next. "I felt like I was responsible for her loosing the suspect and not getting the answer she deserved, so I am going to stop shadowing her"

His next comment indicates that he now thinks that there is hope for them "She told me that she has become accustomed to me pulling her pigtails and she wants me there when she finds the one responsible for her mother's death"

"I want to be there too" he concludes this statement

This chapter in his life is long and detailed and MJ can see he is falling deeper into the detective's charms. The words on the paper are obviously those of a man deeply committed to a woman. But in reading the tales MJ cannot determine if the detective feels the same about this man. She seems to be keeping a distance between them

He writes that one day his main character comes under attack. A killer threatens Nikki and by default, Kate.

A smart savvy FBI agent appears to take over the case. She is bright, intelligent and quite striking in her appearance. But he is most interested in her ability to handle the case.

It has become evident that she is the ultimate target for the killer so he decides to go to her home and protect her. She obviously considers his protection limited at best but agrees to allow him to stay on the couch.

The next morning begins with a room full of police and FBI and this event is seen by the coworkers as more than it actually was. His telling of the story includes comments that he really was amused at their friend's response to his presence at her place the next morning. He tried to declare their innocence but no one bought it

But the story continues that handling does not go as well as it should have and the suspect fools the agents and almost fools him that he has killed himself.

But in thinking about the evidence he determines that she is still in danger. He tells of arriving at her apartment just as the killer detonates a bomb virtually destroying her place. He proudly tells of entering her home now a pile of rubble and rescuing her from flames and bringing her out to safety.

This tale finishes with the pair of them locating the killer and taking him into custody. As a team. Him and her. He admits he had a rush when he stopped her from getting killed. He said she shook for several days afterwards

Then his journal takes a down turn. A handsome detective enters the world of the woman. And he seems to catch her eye and unfortunately her heart.

The writer is struck down, Hard! He is beginning to realize how his inability to talk to her is causing his own issues. She is becoming closer and closer to the robbery detective and the writer is now feeling like it has become a contest. A competition for her attention and right now he is losing to another badge. Of course she is attracted to the badge. He is rough, rugged, a man's man. The type she would go for.

So he fells all he can do now is sit back and watch this relationship build from the cheap seats but before he does, he makes one more attempt. He decides to make one last ditch effort to connect to her. An end run so to speak. He always goes to his place in the Hamptons over Memorial Day weekend and this time he invites the beautiful detective to join him. She seems truly surprised at his invitation, but she responds that she is working. So he accepts her answer of no.

UNTIL

He overhears her talking to the robbery detective and that he arranged a weekend retreat for him and her that she is accepting

He knows now that whatever he hoped would transpire between him and the lovely detective it is in fact not happening now or ever

Her words are written down in the diary for him to read over and over "I didn't want things to become weird between us"

These words hurt him deep so he quickly shifts gears and tells her that her admission about the week end and that she was saying no to his offer so she could say yes to the detective made it easier for the writer to say something to her He just needs to finally give up.

He tells her that he decided this would be their last case together. He writes that he saw a look in her eyes that he thought at first was pain. But he is sure that he was misreading her face with just his hopefulness.

His words give MJ some pain

"I can't do this anymore. I have decided to go away and leave her alone with her new love."

He tells of deciding to accept his ex wife's offer to go with him to the beach. He leaves from the station giving his good byes to the team. Knowing he is not planning on returning. EVER!

She is crying now. She never realized how deep this man's heart became wounded by the on again, off again friendship that was shared.

She lays down this volume and retrieves the next book and begins reading

"Fall is here and I have returned to New York. I am going to try to avoid thinking about HER.I have to get her off my mind somehow. I will bury myself in my daughter's life or my mother's and try to continue my Nikki Heat books but I am finding it almost impossible to keep her off my mind"


	7. The Real Nikki

**We are getting close to the end now.**

* * *

MJ picks up what appears to be the last book from the stack of journals and she begins her reading of the next group of stories in the life of this writer. His perspective on how he came to love and then loose the best thing that ever came into his world. Tightness grips her inside as she continues to read the tales of this man

"The fall in New York is beautiful. I love returning to the city so much Except for this year. I am missing seeing the most beautiful part of it now. That part of working with the NYPD and especially working along side Detective Beckett. But I guess that it really has become old news that I need to get over now. She has her detective boyfriend that she chooses over me. She has the life she wants with him. That is her decision and not mine."

"I am back in town now. I have a book signing to attend later in the week. Just another boring book signing to attend! Then I need to decide what to do next."

She reads as he starts telling in the next line that he is still seeing his ex wife, but being with Gina as his publisher and ex wife is like having cotton candy at the fair only with one change. It was made with salt instead of sugar. It looks all delicious and fluffy but it leaves a really bad taste in your mouth,

She chuckles just a little at his description of her. He continues to bemoan having to be without a path to travel down. In the previous diaries, he usually had some story of police chases, dead bodies or criminal master minds filling the pages. Giving him more fodder for his next book. At this point he is not positive that there will be a next book. At least he knows it will probably not be a Nikki Heat book. He is trying to sever his feelings for her, but they are still strong

His story suddenly takes a curve he was not expecting when he writes that a friend, Myra Sanders who made a sculpture for him, called and asked if he could come over saying she knew he was connected to members of law enforcement and she needs help with something.

He continues the story after returning home from being arrested for her murder.

"I arrived at Myra's apartment to find it tossed and her dead in her bed. Then Detectives Ryan, Esposito along with Kate show up and before I can explain, I am arrested for her murder"

He just can't seem to cross paths with Beckett without getting in trouble. He writes that she questions him like a suspect, but he then returns the favor by flirting with her. He did have to admit to her that he was still seeing his ex wife, but he does not tell her that he wishes he was seeing her instead. The rest of the afternoon does not go well, except he does find out that her and the robbery detective are no longer dating.

He describes that he gets a feeling inside of himself that he last felt when she told him she wanted him around when her mother's killer was found. That crawling in the skin when the hairs stand up. Chills! Goose bumps!

"Maybe I missed my chance with her" he writes

But again she blew him off. He continues in the story that he probably deserved it since he didn't call her when he came back to town but she could have called him as well if she needed him for anything.

When he returns home he finds his daughter is all in up in arms about some boy who didn't call her. He realizes that he is just as a guilty of not calling the detective when he came home from the Hamptons. Alexis story about her boyfriend not calling gives him pause to wonder if he made the exact same mistake. Maybe if he did call things would be different now

He tells of making a deal with the detective, that if he helped solve the case she would let him return to the 12th for more research

The journal goes on to tell how he in fact did help and was able to return to the group

"I wonder if by some slim chance, she would look at me? Again" he writes

MJ is seeing more and more emotion in his writing. It is very evident that his feelings for her have not diminished. In fact it appears from the story he is falling harder and harder

But again the man is taken down when a former cop partner of the detective shows up on the scene. He writes that in spite of the case it is evident that there was or possibly still is a romantic connection between the two of them. Again he feels the tension that exists between him and her diminish when the old training officer arrives.

Once again the diary is filled with unsaid love. The jealousy of the former cop is evident in the story.

The reader is filled with a growing level of sorrow on behalf of the story teller and his wants and desires to be with this woman. Every new line in the volume tells how much stronger he feels each and every day. She beings to think that this woman is in fact NOT the woman she knows and also loves. Is this story about another one who got away? An opportunity he missed? That in fact the woman who finally captured his heart is Not the golden haired detective in these stories?

Returning to the diary he tells of the capture of a killer who attempted to escape justice by shooting his victim with a one hundred year old bullet.

He also tells that he is pulling away from his ex wife due to the reasons he mentioned earlier in the story. They didn't get along when they were married and it is no better today than before plus he has a more important goal in mind.

Then just as he is trying to plan his next move in an attempt to talk to her about how he is feeling his heart is stabbed by the introduction of a handsome doctor to the crew by the detective. She has met and connected with this motorcycle riding physician

"Why do I keep coming back to her? Every time I start to plan my next move, she throws another roadblock in my path"

He writes that he will try to continue working with these detectives but will do everything in his power to not be drawn in closer to her. But his feels so close now, it is afraid he has become a moth drawn into a flame. It is just a mater of time before he will burst into flames and fall into ashes

MJ has grown so attached to this story that she no longer wants sleep. She wants to complete this tale so she can find out how this man finally got over the pain he is obviously feeling

Returning to the book she continues reading. He writes now about a murder involving a male stripper dressed as a police officer and he and her go to the local male strip club looking for a suspect. In this adventure he mentions how absolutely beautiful she looked. But he has one ex wife problem left to resolve and now SHE has a new boyfriend

"I have just come closer to death than I ever imagined" He writes as he begins the next tale. He tells the story of the team encountering a murderer known at 3XK or 'The triple Killer'

It is quite evident that he does not want to tell great details about what took place, just to say that 'SHE' rescued me and when he was waiting to be debriefed she came at sat beside him and took his hand like a friend or lover might to help calm the situation. He tells that he felt a charge of electricity pass thru every cell in his body when she did that.

"Why can't I tell her how I feel?" He writes then underlines the statement

Other cases come and go then he details the time when he was positive they had stumbled on a real alien abduction case, just to find out it involved stolen top secret data.

But he tells of waking up in her car after being drugged by the federal agents. She had her head on his shoulder and it felt like they had just been sleeping together. The spots on their necks looked like hickeys and they had a hard time trying to convince her fellow detectives that it was only where they were given a shot.

Humor in the story is that he wished they WERE hickeys

Then he tells of his chance to purchase a piece of New York history. The Old Haunt. A local bar where he actually visited and wrote some of his older books in one of the booths.

"Upon our visit there, she showed me more of her sexy side that is beginning to drive me to the point I will have to pull back"

Then the death of the owner of a local magic shop brings his mind back to his childhood. He had come to this store when he was younger to find magic tricks. In telling her about his love of magic, she told that she also frequented this very establishment.

"She told me that she knew a magic trick that from its description, I don't believe she would ever perform in public. I wish her teasing would be for my benefit and not just to cause me more pain. I am sure she knows how much I am hurt by her actions"

"I am not sure how much more of this I can take"

The murder of a lottery winner takes center stage in the journal. And the case takes its normal twists and turns. These tales are interesting to MJ as she never knew any details of how all the novels of his came to be and how much was from gleamed from these facts.

Then the story goes down a deep dark pit. He describes having the detective come to his door with a look he is not sure if it is from concern or fear.

"She says she needs to talk to me. After she tells me that the lead detective on her mother's murder wants to talk, we travel to a little coffee shop where we meet a detective John Ragland. He questioned her about me being there. He said he told her no cops. When she told him that I was not a cop but someone she trusted. I was a little taken back by that comment"

Suddenly, a bullet breaks the window and Ragland goes to the floor. He describes seeing blood on her sweater and his fear is that her that was shot and his heart races in a panic, but she was not hit. He describes how different it is to be there when the light go out. Nothing in his research or writing his books prepared him for the event of watching someone actually die in front of you.

He tells of going to her apartment later to see if she is ok only to find her alone. He assumed that her boyfriend would at least be there for her, but he is not. The writer is offered entry and he gladly accepts. Even though he is not her significant other, he is still her friend, her partner and he says he will be there to render any support she needs until…

He must be close to tears while writing this. MJ is almost in tears herself. She sees the love this man has for the woman. Unrequited love. He is willing to love her from afar without any expectations for her to reciprocate

Returning to this tale, the two of them are attempting to rescue their partners who have now been captured by the assassin. He comes up with an idea to distract the guard and they end up in a kiss. He says he did not plan to kiss her, it just happened.

"We kissed and I couldn't breathe. She kissed me back and I head a moan from her like she was as committed to this as I was, but then she took out the guard... We entered the building and saved the boys, but I can't stop thinking. What if we had more time? This was when I should have talked to her. But I didn't. AGAIN, I can't find the words to say to her"

The dairy continues the tales of his heartbreak. After discovering an old high school friend was in fact responsible for the murder in his family, the writer begins to doubt his own ability to read the people around him. These doubts extend now to his thoughts about HER. Any thought he has about a future with her is squashed.

He takes the time to finally close the door on his ex who keeps trying to re connect with him. He would prefer to be alone than with her right now.

Then Nikki Heat enters the picture. At least the actress hired to play his alter ego shows up at the station and begins shadowing the team. This tag along is a striking beauty who injects herself into the daily activities of the team.

Then he describes the afternoon he sees in the detective what he wishes were jealousy as the actress tried to get him to go to her hotel.

"She pinned me in the elevator and told me she was Nikki as she began kissing me But I told her no. I don't know what I am doing right now. My emotions are all over the place. I want Nikki. Not the actress playing Nikki. I want The Real Nikki Heat more Than ever. I know I sound like a love sick fool. And that's exactly what I am"


	8. The End of A Relationship?

MJ looks at the desk clock to see it is now four AM and she is still wide awake. She has to know how this story unfolds because she cannot stand thinking that it all might all fall apart.

As she continues reading his story, a tale of terrorism and threats to our way of life appear. He says they are looking into a murder after a taxi cab is located stripped and abandoned. The driver, a foreign emigrant leaves a widow and small child behind.

When investigating the come across a storage facility where the driver has taken his cab many times.

Once they open the storage unit they discover a large box against the rear wall. When they opened it they discover explosives and then they are alerted that they have been exposed to a high level of radiation. They bid a hasty exit from the building and call in a decontamination unit to come and check on them.

He tells that as they are waiting to discover their fate, he questions her about his doctor boyfriend and where is he now. He can tell from her reaction that he has brought up a difficult subject for her. She tells him that the motorcycle riding doctor is off somewhere saving the world and not there to be with her. She indicates that this emptiness has become a frequent occurrence

He quotes her next words

"I wish I had someone who would be there for me and I could be there for him and we could just dive into it together"

"I tried to gather the courage one more time to tell her that I love her and I want to be there for her always, but I can't get the words to come out when I need them"

But he writes that he is too late once more when the decontamination team arrives and tells them it is OK for them to leave. He wishes they would have just waited another 10 seconds before coming in

"I have never had a problem talking to women. Why is it so hard to say I love you to her? WHY?"

He continues the story of trying to track down the nuclear materials and how he decided to meet with a foreign national to seek information. But his actions resulted in him and her being removed from the task force and told to go home and not try to investigate any further.

After going home and assuring his mother and daughter would be away from the city in the event there was an incident, he admitted he did what he was best at. Getting involved where he should not be involved!

He now has a single focus in mind. Find the material and prove the feds wrong in their assumptions about a suspect

He invites the detective to join him in his 'off the books' investigation and she joins in. They determine that the Government agents are being led down a false road, the duo chooses to pursue their own ideas.

He tells how they did in fact locate the bomb with its timer running and the materials but before they could act, the suspects chased him and her into a frozen foods container and locked them in.

After their failed attempts to free them selves, from a certain frozen death, they huddle together in a last ditch effort to survive.

"I want her to live so badly. If I can just keep her warm until help arrives" he comments

"She passed out while trying to say something to me, but it was probably just my wishful thinking that made me believe she wanted to tell me how much she loved me. I want to tell her. My last thought before passing out from the cold was…'At least we are going to die together in each others arms' I guess that is poetic justice"

MJ feels herself shiver. No from the cold because the temperature in the room is actually quite warm. It must be her emotions causing her body to shake from the knowledge of just how close these two came to death together

When she reads the next paragraph, her eyes fill with tears and she can't help herself. The power of his emotions is evident when he tells what happened next

"I woke up in an ambulance looking at he doctor who just saved my life. It actually was my nemesis. The good heart doctor who was supposed to be out of the country had come back and had actually taken care of me. Of us".

"I looked out to the lot where I saw HER wrapped in a blanket to keep warm. I stepped to her side and could see the love in her eyes for the man of medicine. I stated 'he came back' to which she responded 'yeah he did'. Then I asked a question that I did not want to know the answer to 'what does that mean to you?' The answer ripped my heart from my chest. 'It means we have a chance'"

She continues to read how the federal agent agrees to let them return to the task force. His diary tells of the misdirection and curves the real criminals created to make the event look as if a foreign government were responsible.

But he and HER locate the van, locate the innocent victim that will be blamed when the device goes off and locate the device itself.

But they can see that they are too late. No one has time to come and help them. There are a mere two minutes before they will be turned into radioactive dust particles.

He tells of looking into her eyes that are also filled with pain. He thinks that she wants to say something to him as he wants to say something to her. Again he cannot find any words to use.

She utters one single word "Castle" and then reaches for his hand. At least they will die together and with their proximity to the device he knows they will feel no pain. It will be over in a millisecond. But he says he would have had no regrets to die at her side.

"In desperation, I grabbed all the wires in the bundle and pulled. There was no time left on the clock and we were still alive. We grabbed each other in a warm hard embrace. I got to hug her. If only I could just do that all day everyday"

MJ turns the page and finds only a partially filled page. Before reading it she flips thru the next pages to see that they are all blank. She realizes that there is not much left written in this diary. She certainly hopes that she can somehow finish this story.

Continuing she reads how they went back to the station to unwind. He tells that the team was celebrating in the break room when the Homeland agent stepped in and asked to talk to them for a moment in private.

In the corridor he tells them of his appreciation for their help then after he walks away the couple turns to look at each other and he begins one final time to try to tell her

"'You know. I was thinking…I was thinking… 'Then I saw him. The good doctor walking up behind to see his girl. Not my girl, his girl, so I continued my statement 'I should go home get some rest…Long day…Good night'…and I walked away"

"I cannot work beside her, loving her the way I do. I have to stop torturing myself. I will not ever see her again. This is over! I'm done"

And there is no more written on the pages

MJ is shocked at the last line. She quietly closes the diary and places it on the desk. She has been doing everything in her power not to break down and cry, but she can't stop the tears from flowing at the ending of the story of him and her.

Then she hears the front door of the loft open and close and the voice of a woman speaks out

"MJ are you here?"

"Yes mom! I'm in the study"


	9. Reveal

**I am close to wrapping up this story. I do have one reveal in this chapter and there will be one more in the final.**  
**Have fun**

* * *

"What is the world are you doing here?" Alexis asks "Your dad and I got worried when you didn't come down for breakfast this morning."

"Yeah! I came by here yesterday morning to make sure that everything in loft was all right"

"So have you been here all day yesterday and last night?" Alexis asks

"Yes, mother I have"

"So why were you here all night?"

"Mom I know I probably shouldn't have done it, but I found these journals and I started reading them and I just couldn't put them down. I know that they are granddad's diaries from his younger years. I know I shouldn't have because they are so personal. I mean they tell a heartbreaking story from his early years and then the story of the beginnings of Nikki Heat. I was enthralled. But then it just ends so suddenly like his entire world just came crashing down and it all ended for him"

Alexis walks up to her father's desk and looks at the stack of bound volumes that her daughter had just spent an entire day and night reading

"MJ, it did just end that day for them"

"What do you mean it just ended that day? What ended?"

Alexis picks up the first book that was dated before she was born and smiles "This part of his life ended that day. The part that was before"

"Mom, what do you mean? before? What happened that caused the stories to just stop?"

The red head pulls up a chair from the opposite side of the room and then sits across the desk. She smiles to her daughter and begins "After your grand father walked out of the station that day, he knew in his heart of hearts that his chances with Kate Beckett were over and done but he had no idea that there were forces working in his favor or more accurately in their favor"

"Mother, so THE Kate Beckett of these stories is my grandma Kate?"

"Oh yes without a doubt. Your grandmother is the beauty that my father fell in love with all those years ago."

"Mom, the books tell a story of heartbreak and love lost. There is no indication in the books of them getting together. Why did he stop writing in the diaries?"

The red head pauses a minute not really sure her daughter is ready to hear a story about her grandparents involving their lost love, found love, and especially romantic and intimate escapades. No child, let alone a grandchild ever considers the possibility of those 'old people' in their lives, and that they now know as adults, were EVER sexual beings

"Dad continued to keep a diary after these books were written. It is just the journals that he wrote after these were filled with the love that he was finally able to capture. They tell the tales of what happened. What event finally brought the two of them together?"

"What did happen? What was the catalyst of their love?"

Alexis thinks for a brief moment before letting her daughter hear "I was seriously injured in a car wreck while I was in California and the hospital could not find my mother or contact dad. I had listed Detective Beckett as an emergency contact in my phone. When she got the phone call she actually rushed out to be by my side

"When did granddad get to your bedside?"

"He was off signing books. If you read the other diaries you know that he had given up on her, but she got the call that I was hurt and she rushed out to be with me. When dad got to the hospital, he was told that she had been with me. I was in a coma, but she sat by my bed and talked to me. I could hear her, but I couldn't talk. She sat with me telling about my dad. I knew from what she said that she loved him but she had been fighting those feelings"

"Why was she fighting against them being together?"

"She had been emotionally hurt by her mother's death and earlier relationships that had fallen apart. Dad was known as a playboy and she wanted no part in that lifestyle. But dad changed .because of her. He fell in love with her and was willing to do anything to be with her, but she fought against it for three years"

"Granddad was a womanizer?"

"Oh the biggest. I saw him date many, many women. But he never let any of them close to me. He was very protective of me growing up. Even when he married Gina he kept a distance between me and her"

Alexi's cell phone rings. She looks down at sees the caller and then answers

"This is Doctor Morgan" She listens for a minute "I am in New York right now, have her referred to the clinic at the hospital for treatment. Yes, I will be gone until next week. Thanks Jean. Goodbye" And she disconnects the call

"Ok mother, then how in the world did you and dad meet? I mean really there are so many holes in this story now! I can't see how you and dad came together and granddad and Mimi finally made the journey"

Alexis sits back in her chair and looks out the window. You can thank your Papa and Me maw for that"

"What did they have to do with this?"

Dad left New York on his book tour to try to get away from her. His heart was broken so he left town to do a some book signings. He first went to Boston and then Cambridge. It was there that he met Janice Livingston. She invited him to her home in South Carolina"

"He met my me maw in Cambridge?"

"Yes and when he went to visit them, he met you other grandfather. They told him their love story and he was struck at how many struggles they went through before they were together. They described how neither one was opening to the other and dad thought that he was guilty of the same mistakes. He blamed himself for losing Kate to another man and was planning on returning to the city and at least apologize to her for leaving the way he did. He knew that he had lost the best thing in his life but then I got hurt, Kate rushed to my bedside and when he got to the hospital, she was there and their love story finally came together"

"Papa and Me maw are responsible for them making it?"

"Oh yes! In fact, he proposed to Kate in front of your other grandparents"

"OK so is this how you and dad got together?"

"Yes. When dad and Kate got married, your other grandparents were there with both of her sons. Todd and I connected at the wedding. We spent the entire night talking and afterwards we stayed in touch. He was in school at MIT and we got to see each other and well, you know the rest. We fell in love and got married. I finished medical school and we moved down to South Carolina where he is still running the businesses and I opened my medical practice"

"WOW! Some story. I wish I had the journals to read with all the details"

Alexis laughs "I have seen them. You don't need to read them unless you want details of their love life. I mean details! Dad held nothing back about the way he feels about her"

"The last time I was around them, I could see how much they are still in love"

"Well you get to see them again tomorrow at the party. So is everything here suitable to have you party?

"Yes, mother it is perfect. I am so excited to have my graduation party here at my grandparents' loft"


	10. The Announcement

**I wanted to go into more detail in this last chapter, but life got in the way**  
**I still hope you enjoy**  
**and Yes CB are alive**

* * *

The cleaning crew has completed their work in the loft. Removing all the furniture covers and doing a complete thorough deep cleaning including every nook and crevice. All of the electrical cords have been re connected and the refrigerator has even been re started.

The caterer has arrived and is setting up the buffet tables and arranging the finger foods and the main course. Foods of many types have been brought in for service to those attending this special day.

Alexis is rushing around the loft making sure every detail is in place and. Every tiny item is perfectly correct. This party for her daughter will be great. She is so proud of her daughter and all that she has accomplished in her life. And now her little girl is ready to face the real world.

Martha Janice Moore has been the perfect daughter growing up. Similar to what her own mother was like herself growing up. Always working hard without being told to. Excelling in school in every course she took. And finally graduating from high school with honors and being the class Valedictorian

Then on to the university but to her mother's surprise instead selecting a business degree like her father or medicine like her mother, she choose to follow in the footsteps of her grandfather and picked journalism as her major in college. She excelled in creative writing. It must be in here genes. But Alexis was pleased with what ever he daughter has inspired to become.

Alexis is checking every detail to insure that her daughter's party will be perfect when she hears the front door open and close then a man's voice booms thru the noise of the caterer

"Sis are you here?"

"In here Jimmy." The red head replies as she steps out from behind the kitchen counter. "What are you doing here?"

"I came to help my big sister get ready for my niece's party. What did you think I was going to do? Not help?"

Alexis walks around into the living room and gives him a hug "You know you are my favorite brother?"

"I am your only brother. So how is everything going?"

"Perfect. The loft is ready for the party. The food is out and all we have to do now is to wait for the guests" Alexis steps a few feet away from her brother then turns back around "MJ found dad's diaries and spent all day yesterday reading about his early years"

Jimmy looks to his sister "Was it all of them?"

"OH! No just the early years. Dad has kept the later ones to himself. I think he has them locked in a safe somewhere"

"I know the world is not ready for the stories that are in those books" Her brother laughs

"So true. Jimmy, do you know if everyone is coming?"

"I have talked to Jenny and Kevin. They will be here for sure and Lanie and Javi said they might be late but there is no way they would miss this"

Alexis comments "Hank and Janice are already in town or more accurately they were at the Hamptons with mom and dad. They said all four are all coming in together"

"Fantastic" her brother responds

The siblings work around the loft for the rest of the day to insure the night will be perfect for the graduate

As the afternoon turns into the evening, the first to arrive are the grandparents. The loft door opens and in walks two of the most beautiful women this town has ever seen.

Kate and Janice along with their husbands Richard Castle followed by Hank Livingston enter the loft

Kate stops just inside the entry and looks around. She has a slight smile on her face.

If you were not told that these two couples were the grandparents, you would never guess their ages.

It is evident that all four of them have taken very good care of themselves. Both women are still very slender and have a radiant glow about them. Kate has begun to wear her hair much shorter than in years past, but so has Janice.

The two men, along with their wives, have obviously been taking very good care of themselves. Alexis, being a doctor, began a health plan for both her parents and her in laws several years ago that included a healthy diet and regular visits to the gym. It is evident that it was a wise choice since all four of these look much younger than their real ages

"Mom, Dad, Janice, Hank" The red head says across the room when she sees the four enter "You made it"

Her father responds first "You think we would miss our granddaughter's party?"

"No, I mean you are first to arrive"

"We want to be the first to see MJ" Kate responds looking around "Where is she?"

"She will be here in just a little while" Alexis answers without giving away any details "She had a long night"

Then from across the room "Mom, dad" Jimmy calls out

"Hi son" Kate says as she wraps her arms around her boy "Looks like the whole Castle clan is here"

"Wouldn't miss it" The young man responds. Then looking at the Livingston's "Is Chip coming?"

"He wouldn't miss it" Hank answers. So where's the food? I am starving

"Right this way" Jimmy answers as he leads the four toward the buffet table

The next arrivals to the loft are the best friends anyone could ask for. The Ryan's had arrived early along with The Esposito's. They are followed by all the other members of the police department that the Castle's had either worked with or befriended over the years. Each bringing presents for the graduate even though it was specifically noted on the invitations "No Gifts"

Although MJ grew up in South Carolina and this particular party was planned specifically for the New York group and another party planned for later down south, several friends from there had arrived as well.

Once everyone who has come to the celebration has had enough to eat and spent time visiting, Richard Castle picks up a glass and using a knife as a clapper brought attention to the crowd.

"I want to say thanks to all the friends who came out tonight to honor our granddaughter as she moves from the world of academics to the real world where she gets to start paying her own bills and stops mooching off her parents"

This brings a few laughs from the crowd and a resounding 'Thank goodness' from Alexis and Todd

"I have to tell you that her parents and grandparents all are so very proud of how she has turned out"

There is a round of applause from the assembled group

"I do have to say that I am especially pleased that she chooses to follow in my footsteps to become a writer. As some of you may know, she did publish her first book while a sophomore at Colombia. I also have an announcement to make. Or more accurately there are two announcements. First Black Pawn Publishing is currently in the process of signing her to a three book deal. Many years ago I was offered a similar deal and I turned it down to continue my pursuit of the extraordinary Kate Beckett. I made the right decision to continue to chase the detective. Now tonight MJ is accepting the offer where she is going to be the writer for the re launch of a certain British Secret agent"

This brings a louder round of applause from the crowd

"But more importantly is the second announcement and I will let her tell all of you, MJ? The floor is yours" As her granddad steps back beside his beautiful Kate and puts his arms around her

"This is so hard to do, but…" She looks over to the Ryan's Kevin, Jenny and their son Sean who begins walking toward her. He put his arm around her waist

She looks into his eyes and takes a deep breath "Sean and I are getting married"

This brings the loudest applause the night has seen.

Kate and Rick step up beside the couple and Castle speaks once again

"This loft had been void of laughter for too many years and tonight felt right for this celebration. This space has also been the home for many great stories over the years." Rick and Kate look at their granddaughter "We want your inspiration to write to come from the same place mine did so Kate and I want there to be many more parties here and many great tales written so to the new writer and her husband we are giving this loft to them as their wedding present."


End file.
